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Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Vinaya And Her Little Ones Dhruv, Jeet and Jiya


Most of us parents these days have one kid and are happy and content. Some though have two children to make their happy family complete. But how many of you have three kids these days?!

Meet Vinaya Gundecha, a lovely mother of three naughty and sweet kids. The 33-year-old young mother’s first-born is 7-n-half year old Dhruv, followed by twins Jeet and Jiya who are 3-n-half.

The first delivery was a C-sec and the next was a planned C-sec.

The planning and the 'un-planning':

“The first pregnancy was unplanned, the second was planned, but the fact that we were going to have twins was something that had never once come to our minds” she says with a smile.

So wasn’t it difficult managing three kids, that too when two of them were of the same age and needed all the attention and care at the same time?

“Of course it was difficult, but we both got used to it, and infact, after a while, nothing seemed different anymore” she says, referring to the support and help of her husband Madhur Gundecha.

"Eclipse? Why should that stop my life?"
Married in a traditional Jain family, Vinaya spent most of her pregnancy under the care and supervision of relatives from her husband’s side. And when there are so many elders around, you are sure to hear a lot of advice and tips. One thing that she remembers in particular is that when she was pregnant there was a big solar eclipse. “I was not allowed out of the room for three hours. Forget about going out of the house, I couldn’t even step out of that one single room, and had to be three hours without food or water” she says, going on to add that she herself had no qualms about going out. “Given a chance I would have carried on with my day as always, I am not a believer of these things. After all, there are many women out there who go out to work and can’t afford to take a leave based on an eclipse. Your child’s health is in your own hands I believe” she says with a firm nod.

"Yes I have changed, and only for the better."

Having three kids has definitely brought about a big change, both in her life, as well as a person. “Earlier I was more relaxed as a mother. But after the birth of my twins, when we had three young kids in the house, I realised there was a big change in me as a mother as well as a person. I became much more alert and responsible, I grew better at multi-tasking and more caring towards my little ones and kids in general.” Going on to give an example she says, “whenever we were sleeping, one noise and one of the twins would wake up and cry, thus waking up both the others as well. At times like these, both me and my husband had to work hand-in-hand. If I was feeding one, he would take care to run to the kitchen and get the bottles ready for the other two. If I assured one, he would calm the others down. It was a constant team-work at play” she says, giving her husband full credit for being there by her side.

"I am thankful for all his help and support."
Listening to her praise for her husband, I know there would hardly be any points on which her husband might have been irritated during the pregnancy. And I ask her about the same.
“No, nothing” she says, without even pausing to think if there was something that might have irritated him. “He was always patient, and extremely caring towards me. He would always check how I was feeling and was very concerned that I be comfortable all the time.”

"One minute a mom, next a friend"

Managing a boy is tough, and managing two boys in the house is even tougher, especially when there is a little lady to be looked after and pampered as well. So it is a tough task for Vinaya to keep discipline in the house and at the same time taking care that she does not overdo it all the time. “Sometimes I have to be extremely firm with them, sometimes I am the peace-maker, sometimes I am the judge, maybe scolding one and consoling the other. And sometimes I am a friend. So it is a constant juggling between the two. When the situation tends to get rough and out-of-hand, I am always the mother. Other times I am their friend” she smiles with a twinkle in her eye, something that her kids have surely inherited, add to that a hint of mischief.

Vinaya’s three little ones are growing up fast. The first-born is now a responsible elder brother, the twins have begun school and are learning to face life as individuals, as well as a team, as is the case with twins. And each day of her motherhood is etched firmly in Vinaya’s mind.

“It was very hectic with my twins, the initial years rushed past in a haze. But there is one thing that I experienced with my first-born that I will hold dear in my heart.

"Taking him in my arms for the first time made my life complete."

After the C-sec her son had been taken away for the routine examinations. The entire process was so overwhelming that Vinaya had still not realised what it meant to be a mother. “After about 3-4 hours of the delivery, they handed me my baby, and as I took him in my arms for the first time and kissed him on the forehead, I felt as if my heart would burst open with emotions. It was a feeling that I can never describe in words, yet that one moment made me feel complete as a woman. Holding my son in my arms was the best thing that could ever have happened to me” she gushes with emotions choking her voice.

Of course, holding your little one in your arms for the first time is a never-to-be-forgotten experience, one that no mother can describe, but will tell you that it is by far the best thing she has ever felt. And Vinaya went through this experience thrice.

A house full of children and a house full of happiness. We wish Vinaya, Dhruv, Jeet and Jiya and the entire family a wonderful experience and a happy life always. Happy Parenting!
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